Category Archives: The Past

Throwback Thursday

A couple of months ago, I started seeing hashtags for Throwback Thursday, Back then, I was still in my “ignoramus” mode and was wondering what it was for. The only clue I had was that the pictures were old, that it must be a trend somewhere, and someone must have started the said fad. So anyway, I finally got the chance to jump in on the band wagon and here I am today, spamming everyone on facebook for what I think were very good #throwbackthursday pictures (haha!).

I have posted these earlier:

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Our certificate for completing the Mt. Ugo traverse. 2011 (Ang payat ko. syet.)

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Jop and Rai when they were a 4 months old. BI si Rai, tutok sa TV!

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Jop’s first taste of Cerelac when he was 5 months old. Yes. We were excited and could not wait to feed him.

Still, there are some things that I miss, and here are some of the snippets down the memory lane:

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After party, Josu’s wedding, 2009

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My original baby, Kuking. I don’t think I will forgive myself. Ever.

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First topload and visit to Palawan. 2011. With Rney and Bambi

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The climb that started my passion for mountain hiking. Mt. Manabu. Special thanks to Jaimie and family

So there. I wanted to share more pictures, but I can’t seem to find most of it. This is throwback thursday and I guess, most people wanted to re-live moments in their lives to have something to smile and laugh about.

An Annoying Dream

This morning, I dreamt of a friend. In my dream, she was still the same “manhid” person whom I knew, and this time, her personality in my dream was as annoying as in real life.

My babe and I were in bed, talking the night away, discussing whatever that came into our minds. I heard a knock, and it was my friend Rney, telling me that she and Jaimie will be going home to Laguna, and that I should beware as Jak and her boyfriend with the name of John Lapis, were on the room beside us.

Naturally, I was annoyed. Things turned out for the worst when they transferred to the same bed we were lying in and started chatting. I could still recall myself saying, “akala ko, makakatulog na tayo..”.

The next thing I knew, I was out of the room, complaining to Kewol, and Jak following me to borrow 40 pesos. In my dream, I gave it to her, but I am not sure why. The dream was cut off by the alarm.

I am not sure what this all means. As far as I know, it’s not one of my favorite dreams at all.

disturbing

masama yata talaga ugali ko…

something disturbing happened yesterday. i bought an ice cream from mini stop and was happily licking my way to where i am supposed to ride a jeepney. as i got inside, i noticed a very dirty looking boy. full of grease from head to foot, skinny, sad looking. the man sitting beside him got angry and told the driver to make the boy leave the jeep. i didn’t know what the driver’s reaction was, but he did not ask the boy to leave.

san naman pumasok ung pagiging masama ng ugali ko? i was still eating ice cream at the time and deadma lang ako sa paligid. i kept on stealing glances on the kid because somehow, i am feeling guilty. ewan ko ba.. maybe because of the fact na compared to the kid, i am well off. i don’t know what i could have done. i wish i could have done something.

tsk tsk

i have no idea with what’s happening to me..

i was feeling sentimental today. i kept on playing “when god made you”. this song was somehow a big part of the past. yet, i kept on going back. i hate the feeling but i can’t help it. i’m supposed to post the pictures of my babies, yet, i kept on putting it off.

one thing that i noticed was i want to be bitter, and angry, and hateful, yet i can’t. must be a side effect of my being numb before. honestly, i still care but the normal things that a person from a breakup should be feeling is just not there. i kept on wishing that i could cry about it. but it’s just not there.

so here i am, repeating the should-have-been-our-wedding-songs and trying to reminisce. maybe it’s just the seasons of hearts. i just have to bear with myself longer..

bitter?

well, m tired of crying my heart out. finally, everything has come to a stop. we are officially done. no more thinking of possibilities of being together again. no more wondering if there is still hope, a chance of getting back.

after almost 5 years of being in a relationship, it is kind of hard. habits are formed and a lot of memories have been invested. it is difficult, i know, it could have been sooner. even i am kind of confused as to what happened and what went wrong. i tried to be clingy, and passive, agressive, angry. there’s a lot going on right now.

i want to get out. i need to get out. everything is closing in, yet, i don’t have the power to stop the hurt. hurts like hell but hey, nothing was meant to be easy.