Last year, I remember crying on Mothers Day.
You see, I am a fist time mom and Geoff was only 2 months old then. My stitches were barely healed (I gave birth through CS) and I was overwhelmed with all the changes. I remember aching all the time as I was just getting used to breastfeeding. To top it all, I wanted to do everything, as I fear that the kasambahay that time might not get things right. I remember being stuck in the house all day with no one to converse with. Sure, I have internet access, but I’m sure all Moms out there can relate with me.
Anyway, I remember crying because of all the days, it was the day wherein Geoff chose to have a crying fit. I can’t make him stop, no matter how hard I try. I offered him milk, I danced around, I tried burping him – he only stopped when his dad got him. And during that time, I felt I was not needed. That Geoff favored his dad more than he favored me. I swear, it really broke my heart, thus, I went upstairs to weep and write in my notebook.
I wrote about being how unfair life was at the time, that it was I who spent sleepless nights to nurse, sing lullaby, and sleep while I carried him. The only moment that I felt okay was after I got to talk to Babe about how I felt. He was really understanding and somehow, I really felt better after the talk.
Fast forward to a year after, there were no tears, but the baby chose to throw a tantrum of all the days. Maybe he sensed it, We chose to dine out and spend it with my mom. We trooped over to Las Pinas last Sunday to spend a day in Alabang Town Center (ATC). As there was a special occasion, the place was kind of crowded, we even have to take a number before we can eat. One thing is for sure though, we enjoyed the day. Good food, happy companions, the grandma and the baby missed each other, and I really think it was a good decision to go out that day.
I guess, what I really want to say is that, nothing comes easy, most especially motherhood. You will eventually learn to adjust (I know I am), and everything will fall into place. My baby is growing up, I am gaining a lot of knowledge as I watch him grow up. Everyday is mothers day and there is no such thing as waiting for another year before celebrating a life event such as this.